I have been trying hard to remain focused. I spend allot of energy on things which would possibly materialize to achievement. But I still feel dilapidated. Some of the mistakes that I had cajoled very beautifully in the past keep coming back to me and kick my ass. I know these things cannot be changed but it simply bothers me every now and then. I am actually tired and deeply pissed off. I have taken few decisions in life which I am not very sure off as on date. I feel scared of not getting the right results and making it to the top.

When I see my fellows, things are different for them. Some of them have run away from responsibilities and are in a way moving ahead on their career path without any relative/parental obligations to support. They think big and they get enough time for themselves to evolve and act big. They work and work and work and I am sure they are bound to make it big.

Today, I don’t see myself stand anywhere near them. I have done some blunders in the past and I feel relented. I am aware of how hopeless I feel when I compare myself to some of these people. These people have got opportunity to do something, which I always wanted to do. I have taken decisions on such high costs that presently, I feel just so painful. I really don’t know now what will take to instigate me to move forward. I see blind.